The Truth About What is Old-Fashioned

I love chocolate cupcakes, especially with homemade frosting.  I find the ones I like best are full of the most fat and sugar possible.  Of course, we all know there are healthier alternatives.  Let's think of some... Well, there's cupcakes without frosting (good, but not the best).  Whole wheat cupcakes (better).  Whole wheat muffins with a honey sugar substitute (much better).  A slice of whole wheat bread with a little bit of real butter (probably the best choice considering the other options).

I find it interesting that there are many substitutes in life that we let pass for the 'real thing', even when we know they are not good for us.  I have been thinking a lot recently about the affects of mainstream video games, movies, TV shows, news and the internet on our society.  I recently reviewed an article on the effects of violent video games on violent tendencies, aggression and our tolerance thresholds.  It has been well document that the more one engages in violent video gaming the more one becomes violent/aggressive and/or tolerant of such behavior.  Why is it then that we allow this type of entertainment to substitute for the 'real thing', especially when we know it is bad for us?  We like it.  Sure enough.  It's an easy get-a-way.  Ya, I can see that.  We are not actually hurting anyone. No, sorry I don't buy it.

When we engage in something that promotes actions and feelings that we do not personally espouse (yet) we will become more and more comfortable with that action or thought.  The more comfortable we are with it, the more it becomes who we are.  Ever wonder why divorce and infidelity are so rampant?  I do, all the time.  I have seen close friends and relatives deal with the unfortunate events that occur after their spouse has confessed their infidelity and deemed it as "I never loved you".  That is silly.  Our society has shoved this chocolate covered cupcake of marriage in our face, saying:  It will never be hard, your spouse will look the same way she/he did when you married them 50 years later, you don't have to work together to stay in love, marriage without trust, forgiveness and kindness is okay....  I could go on, but I don't want this to make your ears bleed with these false truths.

Marriage, the wholesome, fulfilling, life enhancing kind is worth it.  All the other stuff we hear about is polyunsaturated fats and empty carbs.  It is my plea with all my family and friends to consider asking hard questions about yourself and your relationship with your spouse.  Some examples (please add your own as necessary):  Am I completely faithful to my spouse?  Do I serve him/her without expecting anything in return?  Have I talked to them (really) about their challenges and joys lately?  When we married what was it I loved about them?  How can I rekindle the 'love' we felt when we dated.

Look, let's face it, I know it is hard to stay 'in love' with your spouse.  You have to work at it, think about someone else other than yourself, and be patient.  To those who have met with the face of divorce (the effects a spouse who ate too many chocolate covered marriage ideas) I mourn with you.  I fear there are many who end up in divorce due to one person's inability to accept their own faults and try to escape the tedious road to recovery.  Please consider all the 'real' qualities that add depth to our life and soul: trust, obedience, faith, love, charity, kindness.  If these are not a part of your regular diet, eat up.